saturday night and the moon is out

[feel_human]

Tucked away off the road in Bon Temps, there's a road house. Warm light spills from its windows, and the sound of a jukebox playing drifts out into the muggy Louisiana night. The regular assortment of trucks and Hail-Mary-please-keep-this-lemon-goin'-just-a-little-longer cars sit in the dirt parking lot; what amounts to about half the town's small population... or, at least, of those of the 'drinking age and above' persuasion.

Inside, it's a bar of the type scattered all across the American South: homey, no-nonsense. Booths and tables. A man in a plaid flannel shirt wiping the bar; a crossdresser in the kitchen singing Gospel hymns and rolling his hips in time with the words just to scandalize the prep cook. A handful of waitresses, bustling about.

Sookie makes her way briskly through it all, a tray balanced on her palm and her eyes kept stubbornly front, as voices swarm around her. Aloud, and... less so.

...I’m just going to have one beer tonight Jesus one beer that’s all...

...better not gripe about me eating fries not after what I did for him last night...

...I cannot wait to get the hell out of this podunk town...

 

 "Well, make sure you do, and before it’s too late," she responds, thoughtless, to the young man. "Because every year you wait? You just get more and more stuck here. Believe me, I know."

He stares at her. So do his parents.

So does the other table. And she realizes, too little too late, that he hadn't said that out loud, not at all. She laughs, uncomfortable. "I’ll get y'all some ketchup," she says, brightly, and flees, ponytail swinging against the nape of her neck as she goes.

Stupid, Sookie, she chides herself. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

 

Comments

[feel_human]

"Well, it wouldn't do much good to go into hysterics about it, would it?"

Her tone and words are as practical as her touch, which she tries not to let linger, even though she hasn't been this close to a boy in longer than she'd like to admit. But she likes his rangy shoulders and his big, gentle hands; she likes the blunt, squared-off angle of his thumb. And she likes the dimples in his cheeks, the shy, serious look in his eyes.

She chances a glance up, sees him watching her, and looks back down again with her cheeks turning pink. "As for bein' good at it... thank my brother for getting into all his scrapes and needin' someone to patch him up, I guess."

[gavemea_45]

"I know a little bit about what that's like." Low and a little wry. He can't help but wonder how Dean's doing; if Dean'll ever forgive him for leaving the way he did.

"But you really are handling it well, Sookie. You're really brave."

[feel_human]

"I don't know about that."

She winds the wrap carefully around his palm and the joint of his thumb, securing his wrist without making it too tight, then secures the bandage with a gentle touch. Finished with her task, she can feel her hands beginning to tremble once more, even though she's still touching his wrist to smooth out the bandage. "I guess I'm the last person who could say somethin' sounds crazy or impossible. And I don't believe in cowerin' away. But..."

She lifts her eyes, large and dark and solemn, to meet his, and her voice drops to a bare whisper. "But I am scared, Sam. Honestly, I'm scared to death."

[gavemea_45]

Her fingers shiver against his hand, and between that and her admission he realizes that she's a lot more scared than she's been showing. Sam shifts, taking both her hands between his, curving his fingers protectively around hers.

"It's going to be okay," he promises, holding on.

[feel_human]

His hands dwarf hers in size and swamp her in sensation: warm skin and textured bandage and gentleness. He holds her hands like a man cradling a fragile egg, and when was the last time someone was protective over her?

Between his touch and his proximity and his eyes on her, she can hear the sincerity behind his words. A tiny smile flutters at the corner of her mouth. "Okay," she whispers. "I believe you."

[gavemea_45]

"Good. Because I mean it." He gives her hands a light squeeze, but doesn't let go.

"Is there anything I can do to make you feel better? Answer questions, talk about something else, um... anything at all?"

He knows exactly what Dean would suggest and wills himself not to flush at the thought.

[feel_human]

He's still looking at her and still touching and her defenses are so shattered right now they might not as well exist, and if she could hear him like she can other people, she's pretty sure she'd be getting a crystal-clear look into his mind right now.

As it is, she gets just enough to make her blush, hotly. She's caught so much more than she's ever wanted to know from the men in the bar, but there's nothing nasty in his thoughts.

It's sweet. And kinda... nice. She drops her gaze to try and cut off hearing any more, unwilling to invade his privacy. She wets her lips, bashful. "Um... sorry."

No chance he didn't notice that. She casts about for something to move past the awkwardness. "I guess... I do have a lot of questions."

[gavemea_45]

She blushes bright, and he realizes she's picked up on what he was thinking. Sam flushes as well and clears his throat awkwardly. "You don't need to be. Sorry, I mean. Um."

He squeezes her hands again and lets go, not wanting to crowd her. God, he's the next thing to a complete stranger to her, and here he is in her house, making her feel uncomfortable-- he's a complete and total ass, no two ways about it.

Sam reaches for his tea and takes a swallow, then meets her eyes again. "Go ahead. What do you want to know?"

[feel_human]

She guesses Dean must be the brother he has such complicated feelings about. Her curiosity on that front is running wild, but she stifles it as best she can and reaches for her own tea rather than move her chair back to where it had been.

"You said you grew up learnin' about this stuff?" He's meeting her gaze without hesitation, and she ought to be able to do the same, at the very least, without going all to pieces. "Have you ever... come across anyone like me before? Who can do what I do, I mean?"

[gavemea_45]

"I did. We did, I mean. But no - I haven't." He frowns a little, thinking it over. "Every so often we'd hear rumors of someone who could do things, but I don't think any of it ever turned out to be true. Except maybe for -- but that's not you, you said before," he finishes, hastily.

"Anyway, it wasn't really the kind of thing we followed up on, so."

[feel_human]

"You and Dean?" she asks, thoughtlessly, then grimaces at herself.

"Sorry. You and... your brother?"

[gavemea_45]

"No, you got it right the first time," Sam confirms. "Dean's my brother, yeah."

Something about his jaw sets in tighter lines as he makes himself add, "And our dad."

[feel_human]

He doesn't get mad at her when she lets slip what she picked up, and something in her shoulders and the way she holds herself relaxes, just a little.

But there's no missing the complex feelings swirling around him at that addition. "I guess it's pretty complicated." she says, soft. "We don't have to talk about it, Sam, if you don't want."

[gavemea_45]

"It's complicated, yeah, but it's okay." Sam does his best to sound convincing. He means it, even though it's hard to think about.

"Besides, it's not going to be easy to talk about hunting and all that without talking about them, too. So it's okay, Sookie, it really is."

[feel_human]

"Hunting?"

She cants her head to one side, her hair slipping over her shoulder. "So you... and your brother... and your dad, you went out lookin' for... like Bill? Vampires, and such?"

[gavemea_45]

"More 'and such,' but yeah. And yeah, vampires too." He sighs. "I'm trying to think how to explain. It's not something we ever - we weren't supposed to talk about it, not to anyone who didn't already know."

His expression turns rueful. "Which you do, now, so. People like us... we're called hunters. Most of us don't get into it by choice. Something - something happens, someone gets hurt or worse, and those who're left behind start looking for answers."

[feel_human]

"I know all about that," Sookie sighs, folding her arms on the table. "Never tellin' or talkin' about it, I mean. Some people guess, about me, but the only ones who really know are Gran and Tara and Jason. And now you, I suppose."

[gavemea_45]

"I'll keep quiet about it," Sam assures her. "Thanks for trusting me."

[feel_human]

"I guess we kinda need to trust each other," Sookie tells him, and rolls her glass between her palms.

She thinks about the wry shade to his expression, the way his tone changes when he talks about his family and what they do. "Sounds like none of this is something you exactly want to do. The hunting, I mean."

[gavemea_45]

He looks down at the tabletop, absently brushing a fingertip over the faded, homey cloth there as though it were a delicate treasure.

"It was that obvious, huh." It's not really a question. Sam takes a long, slow breath and makes himself look back up at her. "It's all I've ever known. I've been hunting since I was eight. I meant it about going to college, the scholarship - I wanted to see if there was something else out there."

A 'normal life?' John's furious shout rings in his memory. He can still smell the tequila on his breath as he screamed in his face. This is normal! This is all people like us get! You walk away from this, you're walking away from us, Sam. If you do, don't you ever come back.

"A normal life," he whispers. "That's all."

[feel_human]

She can't help herself. The way he touches the clean, faded tablecloth, the way he sounds, all of it arrows straight into her chest, and Sookie reaches to curl light fingers over the hand she'd wrapped earlier.

"'Course there is," she tells him, sincere. "There's so much out there, Sam. Even I know that, and I've only ever known this. And if someone like me can have a normal life, then I don't see why not you, too."

[gavemea_45]

He brushes his thumb gently back and forth over her fingers as he looks up at her, startled and wondering at how easily she understands and accepts.

"It's not that I don't want to help people," he says, soft and earnest. "I just thought there might be other ways to do it."

[feel_human]

His thumb runs over her fingers and sends a scattering shiver up her arm, and then he looks at her with his eyes so serious and sincere and what looks like his whole heart, laid open on his face, and for a moment she's too distracted to focus. "Look who you're talkin' to," she says, not even realizing she's responding to the things he hasn't said. "People can be a little short on understandin' in this town, especially for anyone who's... who's different."

She takes a breath and meets that look with her own eyes full of wry sympathy. "And I guess you do want to help people. You're helpin' me, aren't you? Even though you'd rather be doin' somethin' else. I don't see how you couldn't do all the good you want in this world, Sam, if you put your mind to it. Why not?"

[gavemea_45]

"Well, I think you're amazing," he murmurs. His glance flicks to her mouth for a long moment before he makes himself look up again. "Just so you know."

He draws a quick breath. "Anyway, that's - that's why I went after the scholarship. Stanford. I want to be a lawyer. My dad didn't take it too well. So here I am."

He smiles, a little. "But I'm glad I'm here, especially now. I do want to help you, Sookie. I really do."

[feel_human]

His glance flicks down to her lips, and she flushes warmly again, but doesn't look away. "You don't know me very well yet," she protests, but softly. "I'm nothin' special. Just Sookie."

She squeezes his hand, but lightly, in case it still hurts. "Well, maybe your dad will come around, in time. For what it's worth, I think bein' a lawyer is a real nice plan."

Her smile is stronger than his, but sweet as honey. "But I'm glad you're here now, too."